You're a good good father, and other things Christians sing over and over and over...

Ive been sitting in two services back to back at our church for a few months now. Ive been doing that for some personal, life reasons but I have learned a few things because of it. First of all, I always love worship. I love the learning/teaching part of church but worship is my personal release, my "jesus hug" so to speak. It's like the stretching before my workout, it gets my heart in tune to hear the message. I still remember when I began attending a contemporary church. I had attended more traditional churches with pianos and hymns previously. I am totally not dissing traditional worship, I still love it and think there is a worship style/church for each very unique, God-designed heart out there. I knew right from the start of my church visting that I liked worshipping in this "concert style" when I went to worship concerts, but I wasn't so sure that I didn't need that more traditional feel on my Sunday mornings. I still love a hymn to this day, I sing them to my kids (hoping to get those truths hidden int heir little hearts) and I get excited when a new worship song incorporates one of those hymnal treasures. Somehow, I warmed up to contemporary worship and have found it to be so good for my soul. I have had a few discussions recently with people who wonder why in the world, during contemporary worship, the same chorus of a song will be sung over and over. I am not sure what everyone else does when they worship, but I am glad to share what I do and why I personally love those repetitive parts of worship. Typically I love a good song that I know the words to so that I can sing along without watching the screen for the lyrics. Those repetitive songs are often easy for me to learn or catch on to quickly and that makes me happy. I love a new song every now and then too, because I have a chance to let the new words hit my heart and help me grow closer to Jesus. So, when I am singing a worship song that I know, I like to close my eyes. To be be very honest, I also like it that the music in my church is loud and no one can hear me singing ( or so I tell myself) at my church, because I mess up the words sometimes and I really have no idea how to be on key. What is in my heart during worship usually just comes right on out. When I get to stand by someone else who is singing their little heart out too, that makes me even happier (whether they sing pretty or they cant carry a tune either) because it makes me think of what it will be like when we are all worshipping together in heaven and that makes me so stinking excited! Okay, so I just close my eyes and think about the words to the song. If its a song I know, I can really sing them out in a prayer to God.... this is so very good for my soul when my heart is hurting or I have something very difficult going on in my life. I think this is why the "Oceans" song was so impactful. Many contemporary lyrics are a personal cry out to God. You cam just close your eyes, give the hurt to Him and sing to Him that, "I will call upon your name, and keep my eyes above the waves, when the oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace, I am yours and you are mine." I can't tell you how many times, during heartaches in my life that I sobbed and "ugly sang" (thats like a step beyond the ugly cry) through tears to those lyrics. For me, church worship is an outward type of prayer done together with a group of people, with the same focus, similar hurts, passions and struggles. I like to take worship time to let go of those hard areas of my life as I sing those lyrics and praise Him for who He is. Some Sundays I might sing over and over that "He is a good, good father" with my heart full of joy because I know that He is amazing and doing beautiful things in my life, in my heart and out loud, I am joyfully praising Him. There are the other times that I sing those same lyrics and the tears pour from my eyes before I can stop them and I am reminding my self as I struggle to get the words out, "You're a good, good father" because my heart is hurting and struggling to trust Him as things happen that I don't understand. There are still other days that my heart is just plain heavy during worship and I don't know why. Sometimes I cant even sing because the Lord puts something on my heart to pray for. It is a beautiful thing to quietly pray, talking to Jesus, while you are surrounded by others crying out, praising and worshipping Him. I have recently noticed (since sitting in two services) that my heart can change from one service to the next. Typically in the first service I am by Joey, praying and praising together for our personal lives (our marriage, our kids and whatever else life has thrown our way that week). During the second service, I am usually between my sister and my daddy and I am often caught off guard at least once or twice each service by my sister's beautiful singing voice. In between that, I catch myself in the reality that I am sitting by one of my favorite people in the whole world and that cancer has wrecked her brain and her future (while she sings there in peace about it all)... sometimes it breaks me for a minute as I get angry with God and wonder what in the WORLD he is doing. Then I remember that right on the other side of me is my sweet daddy, who I absolutely adore. He is sitting on that side of me because of the cancer that is in my sisters brain. He didn't come to church with us before, but now that she cant drive (because of the yucky cancer, the cancer that I was just so angry at) here he sits, just about every Sunday. And then, because the words to the song we have been singing are the same, I can pray through all of that trying to focus on my heart and sing those lyrics of truth over and over. I can praise Him, cry to Him. and plead with Him just through one repeated lyric of "Good, Good Father" as I try to wrap my little finite brain around that one simple truth that right in between the my back and forth of hurt and hope, He is STILL a "Good good father". He never changed. So, for me.. I don't raise my hands high, I keep them close to my heart and I hold them out sometimes. I think each person should do what they want with their hands, worship is a very personal thing. I close my eyes and I let the worries and joys of the week go, I sing them out to Jesus. I let my brain go to "lyric auto pilot" sometimes so that I can get to the heart of my issues. In those moments, I don't really care what anyone else does with their hands, who is wearing what or doing what, or how they move... because my eyes are closed and I am having my worship time with my Jesus. The whole auditorium kinda fades away and that group worship time usually gets pretty personal for me. While my ears may remind me of the situations beside me, I can focus on my savior and sing my heart out to him. That is why I personally, LOVE a good worship song, especially when we repeat it over and over, and it is then stuck in my head and heart to get me through to the next Sunday.