keeping the helicopter mama at bay

This one...

She has some strange hold on my heart. She knows my buttons and how to push them. She also knows just how to make me melt. She is passionate and loving, feisty and silly all wrapped into one. I would do crazy things for her, just to make sure she knows how loved she is. I would go to desperate measures to make sure that she is never hurt... Two days ago, she came home from pre k crying.. I mean sobbing. In a matter of seconds I must have gone through ten emotions. It typically ends with the mama guilt. I talked with her teacher and the issue isn't really big at all, its little. Her sweet teacher is going to help with it and I am sure all will end well, but for that split, tear filled, second I ended up questioning myself. Did I choose the right school, did I ruin her chance at friendships, did I mess up the friendships she was already building, should I put her back at the school from last year? I prayed, took a deep breath and talked myself out of the autopilot helicopter mama that loves to takes charge when I don't keep her under control. It is the hardest thing to just let her learn. To let her make mistakes and deal with hurt. To watch as she cries. To not "fix" every detail of her life. I want to put her in a happy little bubble where I can just smother her with hugs and kisses 24/7. She went to school again yesterday and when I picked her up she had a smile on her face... all is well again and she is learning, growing, and maturing. Apparently, so am I... ever so slowly. Thankfully, helicopter mama took a deep breath. Maybe this sweet girl will be okay after all.